Make the White House Great Again (For Developers)
Trump greenlights a $900 million ‘renovation’ and suddenly 1600 Pennsylvania looks less like public housing and more like a pre-IPO asset flip.
Panel of tourists behind barricades: “So when do voters get to see the upgrades?” Hardhat Trump, holding blueprints titled ‘2028 LUXURY EXIT’: “After the next funding round.”
Source headline
Trump Administration to Spend Over $900 Million on White House Upgrades
Around the Shallot
Stay in the same broken universe.
Forecasts, satire, cartoons, and quizzes should feel like one publication, not disconnected tabs.
Tech
Nation Debates Whether Teens Or Mark Zuckerberg Get Last Glass Of Water
New AI data centers promise dozens of jobs, hundreds of millions in tax breaks, and one remaining trout in the river, if it survives the cooling cycle.
Aug 25
Forecast
By Early 2027, China Will Slash Iranian Oil Imports Below 400k bpd
Trump’s new sanctions blitz is aimed straight at Tehran’s last big customer. By early 2027, I expect China’s visible imports of Iranian crude to be materially lower than today and far below the pre-war binge, not because Trump defeats Iran, but because Beijing decides this fight is not worth a banking crisis.
Aug 25
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