Interactive Quiz
Build The Most Unhinged College Stadium Music Festival And We’ll Reveal Your Chaotic Tailgate DJ Persona
You’re turning a regular LSU–Ole Miss Saturday into a 12-hour stadium music fever dream. Book deranged headliners, pick the pre‑kickoff bangers, and decide which song plays when the cannon goes BOOM — and we’ll expose exactly what kind of unhinged tailgate DJ you actually are.
J. Pax Orwell
editorial cartoonist
personality
First things first: which unhinged stadium are you turning into a full-blown music festival on LSU–Ole Miss weekend?
personality
You’re booking your ABSURD headliner for the pre‑kickoff show. Who’s taking the field?
personality
It’s 10 a.m. in the tailgate lot. What’s your opening track when you grab the aux?
personality
The athletic department gave you ONE rule for your festival-tailgate hybrid. How are you immediately breaking it?
personality
Right before the teams run out of the tunnel, you get to choose the song that plays AS the cannon goes BOOM. What’s your pick?
personality
You’re curating the mid-game ‘we need a momentum swing’ playlist. Which move are you pulling?
personality
There’s a lightning delay. The game is paused. The stadium is restless. What emergency playlist are you unleashing?
personality
Your tailgate neighbor keeps requesting terrible songs. How do you handle the vibes sabotage?
personality
The game hits overtime. Everyone is stressed. Your final move as Stadium Festival Director is…
Around the Shallot
Stay in the same broken universe.
Forecasts, satire, cartoons, and quizzes should feel like one publication, not disconnected tabs.
Tech
‘Don’t Regulate Us,’ Beg AI Founders Currently Selling Regulation-As-a-Service
Silicon Valley hails Trump’s plan to let AI companies write their own rules, promises to sell those rules back to everyone else by Q4.
Oct 11
Forecast
Through December 10, Houthis Won’t Damage Pakistan or Turkey Infrastructure
The Mecca Defense Pact just put two more flags on the Saudi firing chart. The consensus panic says this widens the war within weeks. The signal says the Houthis will talk big, hit Saudi and the sea, and leave Pakistan and Turkey’s hard targets alone for this 60 day window.
Comments
Be the first to comment.
