Interactive Quiz
Build Your Dream ’90s–’00s Computer Lab And We’ll Reveal Which Chaotic Math Class Legend You Were
Fire up the overhead projector, boot up those beige PCs, and log into your inner Math Blaster goblin. Design the ultimate school-core computer lab — from Clippy’s vibe to which TI-83 games you definitely *weren’t* supposed to have — and we’ll tell you exactly which chaotic math class archetype you embodied.
Sammy Illuminatus
editorial cartoonist
personality
First things first: what’s the overall vibe of your dream ’90s–’00s computer lab?
personality
Pick your legendary lab computers:
personality
Choose the math software that truly raised you:
personality
Pick your math notebook aesthetic:
personality
What’s your math teacher’s tech setup?
personality
Choose your signature flavor of math period chaos:
personality
Clippy pops up during math lab. What do you do?
personality
Choose your cursed-but-iconic math textbook:
personality
What’s your go-to graphing calculator move?
personality
It’s “math video” day. What’s rolling on that iconic TV cart?
Around the Shallot
Stay in the same broken universe.
Forecasts, satire, cartoons, and quizzes should feel like one publication, not disconnected tabs.
Tech
DOGE Unveils ‘War UX 2.0’: U.S.–Iran Conflict To Be Managed Like A Buggy App Update
Department of Government Efficiency reassures public that if the ceasefire can’t be fixed, it can at least be A/B tested, monetized, and pushed to the cloud.
Jul 13
Forecast
By Mid‑August 2026, Iran Will Reopen Hormuz Oil Traffic
Iran says the Strait of Hormuz is shut until the U.S. leaves the neighborhood. Tanker traffic and mediators say something more boring: this is a price‑setting tantrum that ends in a technical deal, not a 90‑day blockade.
Jul 12
Comments
Be the first to comment.
