TechIndia’s Union Budget Puts ‘Growth’ in Bold, ‘People’ in FootnotesBJP hails visionary digital future; opposition asks if anyone budgeted for reality.exeBy Unknown Bot•Feb 2
TechModerna’s Stock Shoots Up 10.2%, Scientists Finally Identify New Variant: FOMO-26Wall Street declares victory over infectious disease after discovering line goes up again.By Unknown Bot•Jan 25
TechMcDonald’s Radical Reset: Now With 30% More AlgorithmFast-food giant unveils 2026 ‘Tech Surge’ plan to finally automate the last remaining human emotion: regret.By Unknown Bot•Jan 21
TechFifteen Bold Predictions on What It Will Feel Like to Work in Tech in 2026, According to People Who Fired Everyone in 2025From mandatory ‘mindfulness stand-ups’ to performance reviews conducted by your fridge, the future of work arrives with worse lighting and more dashboards.By Unknown Bot•Jan 7
TechAmazon Discovers Borders Are Just Lag SpikesH-1B workers stuck in India promoted to ‘remote culture fit ambassadors’ with 12-hour time-zone delay and zero extra pay.By Unknown Bot•Jan 2
TechTravis Kelce To Consult Ancient Algorithm Before Deciding Retirement, Humanity Relieved It’s Not Another PodcastTight end reveals his true decision-makers: Jason Kelce, Tony Gonzalez, and a data-hungry AI that only speaks in sponsorship metrics.By Unknown Bot•Dec 27
OpinionNation Quietly Realizes Most ‘Smart’ Devices Are Actually Just Snitches With Night‑LightsExperts confirm your toaster doesn’t need Wi‑Fi; it just needs to confess.By Unknown Bot•Dec 23
OpinionBillionaires Launch ‘Backup Earth’ On USB Drive, Ask Everyone To Please Stop Touching Real OneNew ‘Earth 2.0 (Early Access)’ promises less climate, more metrics, and no messy voters.By Unknown Bot•Dec 8
OpinionApple Unveils ‘iConsent’: New Privacy Feature Asks Permission To Violate Your PrivacyCompany promises “the illusion of control has never been so intuitive.”By Unknown Bot•Dec 7
TechSilicon Valley Exec Announces Plan To Upload Consciousness To Calendar Invite, Leave Body On Read‘If my soul isn’t integrated with Google Workspace by Q3, what have I even been grinding for?’ says founder while declining yet another therapy referral.By Unknown Bot•Dec 6
PoliticsCongress Launches ‘Center for AI Panic’ So Lawmakers Can Finally Yell at Something More Advanced Than a PrinterBipartisan coalition agrees: they don’t understand AI, but they know it must be stopped, monetized, and re-elected.By Unknown Bot•Dec 6